I have a huge problem. Well, I actually have two huge problems. My first problem is The Batman. Do I see it? Skip it? Wait until I stumble across it on TBS? Did I really need another Batman when Christian Bale was such caped crusader perfection? No. But Andy Serkis? Jeffrey Wright? Come on! Have…

You know how sometimes you find yourself in a situation and wonder how you got there? Is this, in fact, your beautiful house? Is this your beautiful wife? Yes. I’m feeling some Talking Heads this weekend. And welcome to my beautiful house, of which I am the sole architect. It was supposed to be my…

“You’ll have to bury this with me.” This is what my superstitious grandmother told the family when we gifted her an opal pendant necklace. Opals, she counseled, are bad luck for anyone not born in October. As she was the only October birthday in the family, none of us could take possession of the necklace…

Betrayal. It is a deep pain when it comes from something beloved. And believe me – that wallpaper was beloved. It’s a red, blue, and beige floral print perfectly mimicking the wallpaper of a 1980s country kitchen. It lines my powder room, an adorable little nook with a tiled counter and gleaming white chair rail.…

You may recall my absurd attempt at camping last summer. Our campground neighbor drove a pickup truck, the kind with a cover that lowers over the truck’s bed. A Google search tells me this is called a “tonneau cover,” and Google Translate tells me “tonneau” is French for “barrel.” I learn a lot of useless…

So I’m telling you that marrying an outdoorsman leads to all kinds of alone time. My husband and I have a bizarre dynamic – we were married before my husband’s love for the outdoors was fully, well, fleshed. It’s like I married a bald Chia Pet I intended to just sit there, but someone put…

The social media post about a child’s name was harsh. It read something like, “Why do parents think changing the spelling of a child’s name makes the child special? Raising a child to be special makes them special!” Well, my dad gave me a special name and raised me to be special, I inwardly huffed.…

I had an epiphany this week. It came, as I think most epiphanies do, while I was watching Fast & Furious Presents Hobbs & Shaw. I’m kind of in love with the double ampersand there. I saw this movie in the theater when it was released in 2019. I had never seen a Fast &…

So I never got to my butchered Christmas tree last week. I have a word limit. Not a self-imposed word limit – my husband’s grandfather once told me I talk too much. His other grandfather also told me I talk too much. My word limit is editor-imposed. I’m pretty sure no matter how awesome I…

My holidays were marked by a sofa I couldn’t get rid of and a Christmas tree I accidentally murdered. How were yours? Let’s start with the sofa. I bought a new sofa. The old one had to go. There was just one problem. The new sofa was set to arrive on a Saturday. Trash day…